Save Me
by daftydraw
Summary: the story of a broken man, and his struggle to put himself back together again. Klaine fic, rated for violent themes in the beginning, language and possible themes later, although I do aim to make this a fluffy fic not smutty.
1. Chapter 1

**OK so first fic I've posted here, and to those who have already read this i apologise, I read through it and noticed a few spelling mistakes so went through it to correct it only ended up deleting the wrong chapter, so apologies.**

**I have no idea how long this fic will be, all depends how much feedback I get and if people want me to keep writing. so pleas R&R**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Glee characters, songs 'sung' nor am I making any money/profit from this publication, I'm just an avid fan with a passion for writing...**

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><p>Blaine sat in his office looking out over New York City. Down below he could see the tourists in Time Square trying to navigate their way through the concrete jungle. He looked at all the billboards displaying the many Broadway shows on offer then turned back to his desk gazing dubiously at the mountain of paper work on his desk, a sinking feeling in his stomach.<p>

His day went by uneventfully as he worked his way through the many press releases he'd been given, trying to find a story. His colleagues left the office around six and he was still working as the clock stroked half past nine, he hadn't even noticed it get dark outside nor had he noticed the lights come on. It was only when there was a loud rap at the door that he looked up.

"Hey dude you're _still_ here? I thought you'd have gone home _hours_ ago." His old friend said.

"I have to get this finished Dave." He mumbled looking back to the screen to find it blank.

"Look, I don't say things like this often, because we're guys and it sounds weird. But I'm worried about you B, you come into work at the crack of dawn and leave way after happy hour constantly working but not moving anywhere. You don't want to be here Blaine. And you don't belong here. You belong out there!" David said pointing at the billboards outside. "You belong in the spotlight, not writing about the people in it!" Blaine sat in silence. "Do you even play anymore?"

"No."

"When was the last time you sung or wrote music, or even just jammed with your guitar?"

"About five years ago..." Blaine said staring at his hands. Remembering the last time he'd played. The ghost of a memory fell over them, the beautiful spring morning, glorious sunshine and birds chirping happily as the congregation made their way into the morgue.

"Oh..."

"I just, I can't...it just brings back all those memories and I just can't!" David sighed, an old pain lingering in his heart.

"Right come on, get up!" He said after a few moments thought, throwing Blaine his jacket from the stand by the door.

"Where are we going?" Blaine asked standing up and pulling the black coat around his shoulders.

"You'll see."

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><p>Blaine, David and Wes had been best friends since Blaine's first day half way through sophomore year, he had been assigned to David and Wes's dorm and the three had hit it off instantly, they had given him the courage and support to realise that being gay was not a bad thing, and helped him learn to accept himself. <strong>**<strong>

Dalton Academy was an all boys boarding school on the outskirts of Westerville, Ohio. As a state, Ohio was not accepting of Gay people or of their rights. They were treated with indifference and prejudice and sometimes violence, it was something Blaine faced anywhere he went, but within the walls of Dalton he was safe, and, with the support of his friends he had learned to accept and love himself for who he was.

Then one day, half way through their senior year a catastrophic event had happened that had changed their lives forever.

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><p>It had been the first really nice day of the year, and after the winter they had had the Dalton Boys were enjoying it. Looking back Blaine thought it was ironic really, considering what happened next.<p>

Being at a school that did not tolerate bullying or harassment of any kind meant that the students could enjoy their lives in harmony and they grew up with an appreciation for just about every type of person in the world. Because of this, it was of course a shock then when one spring morning in their senior year, a sophomore turned up to class with a gun and open fired on the entire school.

The boy in question had been in love with Blaine, so much so that he had actually taken to stalking him. Waiting for him in the mornings, springing up on him at random times in the day, one night Blaine had actually woken up to find the boy staring at him through the window. Blaine and his friends had tried to talk to him quietly stating that he was in fact happily in a relationship with someone else and that Sean was lovely but a bit too young.

He had disappeared after that for about three weeks, until he showed up one day...with a gun.

He had open fired on the school, twenty people were injured, and one person had died...

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><p><strong>Once again feedback is encouraged and welcomed, no matter if its good or bad! Please if you like it, R&amp;R<strong>

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><p><em><strong>P.S. Sorry guys needed to make a few changes as I got further in, I need to change exactly how long Blaine had been at Dalton...instead of it being as stated in the story so far (they all started at the same time) It is now going to how it actually is in the show and he transfered some time through his sophomore (sp?) year... sorry <strong>_


	2. Chapter 2

**So wow 39 hits so far and 1 review thanks every so much :) Here's the next chapter, please review it, it really does help me get better when i recieve feedback. Also please don't hate me for what happens in this chapter...WARNING! Violent themes in this Chapter!**

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><p><em>Sean walked calmly into the school; gun held aloft in his hand, looking for Blaine. If anyone yelled at the sight of him, or didn't know whererefused to tell him where Blaine was. He shot them._

_He eventually found Blaine sat in the Warbler common room with Wes and David talking about set lists for Regional's. He watched them for a while staring at the perfection that was Blaine; the way the sun shone in through the window and reflected off his beautiful hair and danced in his eyes. He moved slightly towards them._

_Blaine saw the movement out of the corner in his eyes and spun around looking at him. He saw his eyes flicker to the gun in his hand and Sean smirked._

_"Hello Blaine." He said silkily._

_"Sean, hey. What you up to? Haven't seen you around for a while." He said trying to keep calm and casual._

_"I've been at home, healing."_

_"Oh."_

_"My heart is broken Blaine. Shattered into a million pieces, and I've been trying, so very hard to figure out a way to fix it, to work out a way to make myself feel better."_

_"I'm sorry I hurt you Sean, but I have a boyfriend. And I'm nearly three years older than you." Blaine said standing up so he was on the same level as the younger boy._

_"I've been thinking hard, about what I could possibly do to stop myself thinking about you, which I do, _all _the time." He said in the same silky voice. "And it finally came to me. The only way you wont be on my mind, is if you don't exist." The gun in his hand shook in his grasp._

_By this time more Warblers had turned up lining the doorways, watching in shock and fear as the sophomore slowly brought the gun up to level with Blaine's head._

_Blaine had his hands held up in surrender, his eyes wide in fear and shock, he had backed into the table he'd been sat at._

_"I love you Blaine." Sean said. "If I can't have you. No one will!"_

_Then many things happened at once, and happened as if in slow motion; Sean pulled the trigger, the lead bullet shot out of the barrel and flew through the air._

_Thad and Jeff leapt forward grabbing Sean, Thad grabbing his hand and pulled it upwards gripping his wrist so hard the gun dropped from his grasp. Together, the two seniors tackled him to the floor._

_At the same time, on the other side of the room, Wes and David had stood up, Wes grabbed Blaine and threw him to the floor out of harm's way twisting in front of him to protect him as the bullet went straight through his neck and through the other side, hitting the bookshelf and fell to the floor with a soft thud which went unnoticed over the yells and screams in the room._

_Wes fell to the floor his eyes wide open but un seeing a single tear fell down his cheek. Blaine and David crumbled beside him frantically shaking him awake but both knowing it was pointless. Wes had been hit at point blank range through the neck shattering his wind pipe._

_What happened after that neither man could really remember, there had been a service of course. And Sean had been locked up in a psychiatric ward._

_All the Warblers attended the service, Blaine and David had written a song together especially for it and performed at the wake. That had been the last time Blaine wrote or sung anything, and wasn't intending to ever again._

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><p><strong>Ok so, I know Wes is a beloved character, I love him too but it had to be either him or David...it had to be someone whoes death would affect Blaine greatly, couldn't be Kurt and i don't think any of the other Warblers would have affected him so much, although he would have been upset obviously. So yeah please don't hate me! Please R&amp;R if i get some lovely feed back (I welcome negative comments as well as good-they make me better as I know where to improve on!) i will post shortly :)<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

**Cannot believe I've had so many hits today! Thank you all so much, glad you seem to be enjoying it, also thank you to the people who have added the story to their alerts! makes me feel incredibly good :)**

**So here is the the next chapter, I know a few people are wondering when Kurt will appear, he will arrive soon I promise, I'm actually writing his entrance now :) So here is the next chapter I'm sorry its a bit crap, but I needed a filler to lead into what happens next. So here it is...**

**Oh and also, there is some language in this Chapter, just to let you know. :)**

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><p>Blaine completely blamed himself for his best friend's death and struggled every day with it, most days he could get by as normal as possible; the pain was always there, but sometimes it crept up on him and threatened to smother him completely.<p>

Today was one of those days.

He and David had stopped walking and he looked up to find himself outside of a small Dive Bar.

"David, what are we doing?"

"You my sorry and depressed friend need a drink, as do I, it is Friday night, there is no work tomorrow and today has been the day from hell."

"And you think drowning our sorrows is the best way to pull out of this hole do you?"

"Not indefinitely no, but, you need to let lose! You have been bottling up and hiding for way too long, you blame yourself for what happened which is ridiculous! And if Wes were here he would kick your ass from here till Tuesday for even thinking it."

"It is my fault..." Blaine trailed off.

"No. Blaine. It wasn't, it could easily have been I that jumped in front of that bullet for you, I would have done it for either of you, as I am sure you would have done if it was either one of us." David said pointedly. Blaine hung his head and half nodded.

"Doesn't make me feel any different though...it wasn't another way around...and one of my best friends died because of me, and do not say it's not my fault! It was my fault; Sean came in to school looking for me that day! He wanted me!"

"Yeah and he got you...Blaine, you say it should have been you? You say you wish it had been you...well in some ways it was." David said his voice cracking under the old pain that was beginning to surface. "You lost Wes that day, I lost you both! Wes died!" Blaine flinched "And you, you as good as died too. You used to be the life and soul of any room Blaine, you cheered everyone up with your eagerness and optimistic view of life. Your jokes, your music, your voice. Everything you did was just so..._you._" David said strongly. "And then you were gone over night, I literally watched the life flutter from you, it was literally like you had been the victim of a Dementors kiss...your soul was ripped from your body and you turned into a robot! You go from day to day in a state of auto pilot, you get up, shower, go to work, go home, eat, and finally drink yourself into a stupor till you wake up the next morning on your sofa, or floor or fully clothed on your bed and go through the whole process again. You don't sing any more, your guitar hasn't left it's dusty cage in years and you don't even listen to the radio any more. It is literally like you died that day too." He had tears running down his cheeks now. "You are my best friend, but you need help! And I don't know what to do, so tonight we are going to get royally pissed, I am going to sleep on your couch and tomorrow we are going to work on getting you back to the bubbly annoying Blaine that I used to know."

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><p><strong>Thanks again guys, please review :)<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry for the shortness of this Chapter, i could blend this one and the next one together...but I like keeping the suspense :p I hope you guys like it and I hope the pace of the fic doesn't seem too rushed, not sure how long it will be yet...on other fanfic sites I'm kinda known for writing lengthy ones, but the trend on here seems to not be short and sweet...so we shall see, please tell me what you think. I really do like comments as they let me know where I can improve! Here you go :)**

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><p>Blaine woke the next morning with a headache the size of Jupiter, it felt like there was a little man between his ears clanging a gong every few seconds. He squinted against the harsh sunlight that bathed his room and rolled over burying his face in his pillows groaning loudly.<p>

There was movement beside him and Blaine froze. He remembered David going home early and that he insisted on staying for more drinks, after that he couldn't remember anything. His first thought was _Please don't let it be Charlie!_

Charlie was his ex; it had ended about a year ago, badly! But every few months or so they met up on a night out, hooked up and then hooked up again for a few weeks before realising they couldn't stand each other and broke it off.

In the back of his head he knew it wasn't him, there wasn't so much pull on the duvet for a start, the dip in the bed was lighter and the quite breathing was steady and soft...all three qualities which were the complete opposite of Charlie. He just wished he could rack his brains and remember who it was.

Realising this was impossible and that the only way to know for sure would be to look he gingerly lifted his head, he gazed at the man next to him, duvet covering the lower half of his body, his naked back exposed, his pale skin was tinged with a pink glow.

His face was hidden but as he gazed at the man next to him, the soft dark brown hair, the large brown single freckle that sat just below the hair line he could picture the face instantaneously;

The shocking pale blue/green eyes, strong jaw line, beautiful rosy cheeks and the lips...those lips...the lips he hadn't touched for five years...

_Oh..._

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><p><strong>Once again thanks for reading, hope you like it, please leave a comment :)<strong>


	5. Chapter 5

**Ok so...I've had loads of hits and 4 people have added the fic to their alerts, with one person adding it to their favourites which is absolutely amazing and flattering, but i'm still not getting reviews and it's making me reluctant to keep posting, please tell me what you think guys other wise I may stop posting. I'm guessing some of you are writers yourselves and if you are you know how much any sort of feedback - good or bad - is worth. So yeah, please leave me a comment! And here is the next post! **

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><p>Blaine sat up and stared at the man in front of him, he hadn't changed a bit, sure he had aged, but his body was still the same shape, lovely purt bottom, toned back, thin muscular arms, and even though he couldn't see, he could picture the slim toned hest with that perfect V.<p>

_Did we? Oh god? I haven't seen this man in five years and if we...this is not how I wanted a reunion to be...but wait, I have pyjama pants on...so that didn't happen._

_What's he doing here? He's still as beautiful as ever...but no don't think that Blaine, you broke his heart, you have no right to think that anymore._

The body stirred and then was still, Blaine could imagine those stunning eyes surveying the room and wondering where they were. The young man rolled over on to his back and glanced up at Blaine. Blaine stared at him, unable to say anything.

"Hello Blaine."

"Hey." He squeaked back. "Umm...did we? Umm I mean what? Umm huh?" Blaine stammered out running a hand through his hair.

"You don't remember last night at all?"

"Umm, no? Wait you do?"

"I was sober Blaine, and no, we didn't..."

"So um, what?"

"What am I doing here?" Blaine nodded, he didn't mean to seem rude but; his head was on fire, he was starting to feel a lot more of his body which somehow felt like he'd been hit by a truck and the former love of his life was sat up calmly in his bed looking at him like he hardly knew him. "I live here in New York now, I work at Latinos and was there last night. You were pretty wasted by the time you arrived, David was with you, he spoke briefly before his phone rang and he had to leave, you insisted on staying for drinks and got progressively drunk as the night went on. When it came to closing time you were so drunk you could hardly walk, and when I realised you lived a few blocks away from the club I offered to walk/carry you home. I brought you up and tried to leave but you wouldn't let me. I tried to lay you down on your bed and you clung to me, almost afraid of letting me go...so I stayed, but nothing happened."

"Oh...well hi?" Kurt half chuckled.

"Hi."

"Has been a long time."

"Five years."

"Fancy some breakfast?"

"Are you cooking?"

"Well, I have flour, and milk and eggs, I could make us some pancakes?"

"No offence...but I remember what your cooking is like...I'll make them."

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><p>Blaine sat at the breakfast bar watching as Kurt fluttered around the kitchen, he had borrowed one of Blaine's t-shirts to cook in as all he had with him was his work uniform from the night before. He looked so at ease standing there in his boxers and borrowed t-shirt it was almost like nothing had happened...but it had obviously...they were just friends now...if they were even that any more.<p>

They were silent as Kurt cooked, he occasionally broke it to ask where something was before falling back into silence.

_Say something!_ Blaine thought to himself, _you haven't seen this guy in five years! Say something, anything!_ But what could you say to someone who you'd loved more than anything, and who had loved you the same? Because they had, they had been like conjoined twins from the day they met, Blaine could remember it as if it was yesterday.

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><p><strong>So yeah umm once again hope you enjoyed it :) the next chapter will be a flash back...Please please please tell me what you think, even if you hate it, i actually welcome constructive critisism more than good, although good is good too lol. More to follow soon!<strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**Here's the next chapter guys, hope you enjoy, sorry it took so long, but I've been trying to write ahead of what i'm posting so I dont get left with nothing to post if i get writers block...which i've had for like the last year...so i'm scared it will come back lol. anyhoo, here's a chapter for you, is a bit long and is transcribed from the episode 'never ben kissed'.**

**Do not own glee, or the characters, just a fan with ideas :)**

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><p>-Flashback-<p>

_All around him was chaos as the whole school made their way towards the senior commons. Blaine was late, he had been called back in English to talk about his paper on Chaucer and was now hurrying as quickly as he could down the spiral stairs. Out of the corner of his eye he noticed a new boy who stuck out like a sore thumb, but he was in a hurry so he ignored him, that was until said boy called out to him._

_"Excuse me?" He asked in a soft voice, sighing inwardly Blaine turned around silently cursing his 'nice person' part of his personality. This changed how ever when he cast his eyes about the wonder that was in front of him. The boy was a couple of inches taller than him, around the same age and had impeccable style. His dark brown hair was styled perfectly and his eyes...Blaine caught himself staring for a minute not realising that the boy had carried on talking. "Can I ask you a question? I-I'm new here!" Blaine shook himself mentally before sticking out his hand._

_"I'm Blaine." The boy looked at him and wore a slightly flustered expression before extending his own hand and shaking it with Blaine's._

_"Kurt." He said smiling, he's smile was awesome, this guy was awesome."So what exactly is going on?"_

_"The Warblers." He said excitedly, no harm in a little innocent flirting "Every now and then they throw and impromptu performance in the school commons. Tends to shut the school down for a while!" He said impressively._

_"So wait, the Glee club here is kind of cool?"_

_"The Warblers are like, Rock Stars." He said, more harmless flirting. At this statement shock and wonder drifted over Kurt's face, Blaine smiled and took his hand again, "Come on, I know a short cut." _

_He led Kurt, hand in hand, down a hidden corridor towards the Warbler's common room. He opened the double doors into the common room and they were met with chatter. He turned to Kurt and led him to the front of the crowd._

_"Oh I stick out like a sore thumb!" Kurt whispered._

_"Well next time, don't forget your jacket new kid." He said smoothing out the nonexistent creases in Kurt's jacket collar. "You'll fit right in." He winked at him and he saw the boy blush slightly. Just then the acapella harmonies started and Blaine half glanced round before addressing Kurt, "now if you'll excuse me." He turned around and walked towards the choir of boys that had joined in the front of the window. And started to sing._

**_Before you met me, I was alright_**

**_But things were kind of heavy_**

**_You brought me to life_**

**_Now every February, you'll be my valentine_**

**_Valentine_**

_He looked at Kurt again singing to him, _still with the mindless flirting _he thought to himself, but he figured he'd never see the boy again so it was ok, it was very obvious he wasn't a student here._

**_Let's go all, the way tonight_**

**_No regrets, just love_**

**_We can dance until we die _**

**_You and I will be young forever._**

_He kept changing between singing to his choir and looking at Kurt, winking or smiling cheekily at him whenever he did, Kurt's face was lighting up more and more his eyes so wide Blaine thought they might pop out._

**_You make me-_**

**_Feel like I'm living a-_**

**_Teenage dream-_**

**_The way you turn me on-_**

**_I can't sleep-_**

**_Let's run away and don't ever look back-_**

**_Don't ever look back _**

**_Let's go all, the way tonight_**

**_No regrets, just love_**

**_We can dance until we die_**

**_You and I, will be young forever_**

_Blaine kept his eyes on Kurt who was watching on in fascination, he saw him glance around the room looking at the on lookers getting into the performance and looking on at the boys they wish they were cool enough to be._

**_You make me-_**

**_Feel like I'm living a-_**

**_Teenage dream-_**

**_The way you turn me on-_**

**_I can't sleep-_**

**_Let's run away and don't ever look back-_**

**_Don't ever look back_**

**_Ima get your heart racing_**

**_In my skin tight jeans_**

**_Be your teenage dream, tonight_**

_He saw Kurt get incredibly bashful as they sung that line and Blaine relished in the colour, he was feeling a sudden pull to the beautiful stylish strange boy stood staring at him like he'd never seen the sun before and that Blaine was it._

**_Oooooh oooooh ahhhh ahh _**

**_Oooooh oooooh ahhhh ahh_**

**_Oooooh oooooh oooooh ooooooh _**

**_Ohhh_**

**_Yeaaaah_**

_He pretended to air guitar on the yeah before he fell into the chorus again_

**_You make me-_**

**_Feel like I'm living a-_**

**_Teenage dream-_**

**_The way you turn me on-_**

**_I can't sleep-_**

**_Let's run away and don't ever look back-_**

**_Don't ever look back _**

**_My heart stops-_**

**_When you look at me- _**_(he looked at Kurt and pointed to himself with his thumbs as he sung this bit)_

**_Just one touch-_**

**_Now baby I believe-_**

**_This is real-_**

**_So take a chance and-_**

**_Don't ever look back-_**

**_Don't ever look back _**_(again he looked at Kurt pointing and winking at him this time)_

**_Ima get your heart racing_**

**_In my skin tight jeans_**

**_Be your teenage dream, tonight_**

**_ Let you put your hands on me_**

**_In my skin tight jeans_**

**_Be your teenage dream tonight_**

_As the song ended Blaine did the customary congratulations of a great performance to his fellow Warblers before making his way through the crowd to Kurt, who was smiling insanely and clapping furiously._

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><p><em>After the performance David, Wes and Blaine invited Kurt for coffee, they all settled down around a table and Blaine handed Kurt his drink.<em>

_"Latte?" he said sliding the paper cup across the table, Kurt mouth 'thank you' "This is Wes and David." Indicating the small Chinese boy and tall coloured boy either side of him_

_"It's very civilised for you to invite me for coffee before you beat me up for spying." Kurt said trying to be witty, but inside actually pooing himself._

_"We are not going to beat you up!" Wes said holding his hand up._

_"You were such a terrible spy, we thought it was sort of, endearing." David added._

_"Which made me think that spying on us wasn't the real reason you came?" Blaine finished. Kurt opened his mouth and laughed nervously. _Busted!

_"Can I ask you guys a question?" They half nodded. "Are you guys all gay?" they all laughed, Kurt squirmed awkwardly, waiting for the abuse to start._

_"Uh no." Blaine answered catching his breath. "I mean, I am, but these guys have girlfriends." He indicated to the other two._

_"This isn't a gay school! We just have a zero tolerance harassment policy." David said kindly._

_"Everyone get's treated the same, no matter what they are. It's pretty simple" Wes added._

_At Wes's words Blaine saw Kurt's face widen in surprise and pain, moisture was beginning to form behind his eyes. Sensing something private he spoke to his friends:_

_"Can you guys, excuse us." The other guys nodded and smiled kindly at Kurt._

_"Take it easy Kurt!" Wes said. The two boys got up and left the room. Blaine gave Kurt a few minutes to compose himself before talking._

_"I take it you're having trouble with school." Kurt closed his eyes against the tears and nodded._

_"I'm the only person out the closet at my school." A single tear rolled down his cheek. "And I, I tried to stay strong about it, but, there's this Neanderthal who's made it his mission to make my life a living hell. And nobody seems to notice." Kurt took a shaky breath and tried to calm himself down, tears now spilling freely down his cheeks._

_"I know how you feel." Blaine said simply, thinking back over the old memories from when he'd been at his last school. "I got taunted at my old school and it really. Pissed me off." Blaine said in a hushed voice the old pain coming back all though it was dulled slightly now. "I even complained about it to the faculty, they were sympathetic and all but, you could just tell that no one. Really. Cared. It was like, hey if you're gay, you're life's just going to be miserable. Sorry. Nothing we can do about it." Kurt was looking at him properly again now, he could sense a kind of hope radiating from Kurt that maybe there was someone who knew what it was really like. "So I left. And came here. Simple as that." Kurt looked down, knowing full well that his dad could never afford to send him here._

_"So you have two options." Blaine said suddenly feeling strongly protective of the boy in front of him. Kurt looked up. "I mean I'd love to just come and enrol here, but tuition at Dalton is pretty steep and I know that it's not an option for everybody." Kurt continued to look at him. "Or, you can refuse to be the victim, prejudice is just ignorance, Kurt. And you have a change right now, to teach him."_

_"How?" He asked speaking for the first time since Blaine's story._

_"Confront him!" Blaine answered sitting forward. "Call him out." He could see Kurt debating his words as he said them so he said the one thing that was constantly at the back of his mind."I ran. Kurt. I didn't stand up. I let bullies, chase me away. And it is something I really, really regret." _

_Blaine had the afternoon free after that and he and Kurt sat talking about their bullying experiences and at the end of the day as Kurt turned to leave Blaine had given him his number and told him to call if he needed to talk to someone, he had decided at that moment that he wouldn't abandon Kurt, he would let himself be a confidant to the teenage boy stood in front of him in his designer clothes, the pointless flirting fell to the back of his mind as the urgent need to protect Kurt over took him._

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><p><strong>Hope you enjoyed it :) bought the new sims3 expansion pack yesterday, how amazing is it? gonna go play it now i think :) please R&amp;R<strong>


	7. Chapter 7

**I really would just like to say thank you to everyone who is reading, commenting, favouriting and alerting. It really means alot to me!**

**Here is the next chapter, I'm sorry if it seems a bit jagged, but I haven't written in almost two years so I'm a bit rusty, and with so much back story I'm trying to explain what's happened without putting it into huge paragraphs. But I'm doing my best to correct them, I'm not sure how much longer it will last, my original ideas have kind of been taken over with new ones, there are definitely going to be 3 or 4 chapters left, maybe more, but at the moment i'm aiming for a 10 chapter story, but we shall see, I do have other ideas for different fics on the drawing board, but as its been so long since I wrote anything I dont want to take on anything too big straight away.**

**Any way, here is the next chapter, once again than so much for your support :)**

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><p>After that day Kurt and Blaine had become inseparable, mixing their two worlds together; Blaine acting as a mentor for Kurt but learning from him at the same time. He made Kurt realise that he deserved to enjoy life, and be proud of who he was instead of living in fear. And in turn Kurt helped him come to terms with what he had been through, and taught him about romance and passion.<p>

After a few months and an awful incident at McKinley Kurt's father and step mother had allowed him to transfer to Dalton and their bond had thickened. Kurt had fit in easily with the trio that was Blaine, Wes and David and the four boys became even closer. It wasn't until Valentine's Day; after a disastrous public display of affection for someone, that Kurt admitted he had feelings for Blaine.

Blaine had feelings for Kurt too of course, but it took him a while to realise exactly what they were, finding it difficult to move from the best friend/mentor role he had taken.

One fine spring morning just before their regional's competition Blaine's brain had finally clicked and he realised that he was in fact in love with Kurt too.

And the rest as they say was history.

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><p>They had each been each other's firsts at times they had been so sickingly cute that their friends, whilst happy for them, preferred to let them be.<p>

When Kurt transferred back to McKinley there was never any doubt that they wouldn't work, and to Blaine though he didn't realise it at the time, it was a blessing in disguise.

Had Kurt been at Dalton on the 3rd April 2011 it would most surely have been him that jumped in front of the bullet for him, and he would not be here now making pancakes. And the thought of that would just be unbearable. Although for the way he acted after that day, it may as well have been Kurt.

After Wes' death, Blaine had been so overcome with grief and guilt that he had pushed everyone away, most importantly Kurt.

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><p><strong>Sorry about the length, it looks longer in word and then put it up here and it gets stretched, thanks again guys!<strong>


	8. Chapter 8

**Ok so bit of a long chapter here to make up for the crappy short one last time. I really am not too sure about this, i tried reading it out loud and it reads OK, but I just hope I've done it justice. Please tell me what you think, thanks again for the support...**

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><p>Blaine thought back over the amazing year and a half he had spent with Kurt, both as friends and boyfriends. They had learnt from each other and grown together. But through his own stupidity he had pushed away the one person who could truly have helped him. This, now he came to think about it, was probably the reason he was so messed up.<p>

Blaine sighed inwardly, he really was a mess and had broken the heart of the only person he had ever, and would ever truly love.

Kurt placed the plate of pancakes in front of him passing him syrup and cutlery before joining him at the breakfast bar. They ate in silence, a silence which they had always felt comfortable in, they hadn't needed to talk all the time, just being in each other's company had been enough.

"So, you work in a bar?" Blaine asked, breaking the silence. Kurt finished chewing and swallowed before speaking.

"Yeah, I came here with Rachel right after college to be on Broadway, she of course was successful straight away." He said a hint of jealousy in his voice. "I on the other hand...well, I've been here a year and I'm still at the bar. The market isn't as broad for a countertenor." Blaine bit the inside of his gum. That was very true.

"Sorry. Is there, is there nothing else you'd like to do?"

"Well recently I have been thinking I'd like to try my hand at costume design, I love fashion, and have always seemed to have a good eye for it." Blaine smirked at a particular memory of Kurt forcing Wes and David into Lady Gaga costumes for a Dalton social event shortly after he joined the school. "I'm saving up to go to college in the evenings, I want to study fashion design. If I can't be on Broadway I can at least make the people on it look spectacular!" Blaine smiled.

"That sounds like an awesome idea!" Kurt half nodded and popped another fork-full of pancakes into his mouth he chewed slowly before asking his next question.

"So what are you up to now? I'm surprised your name isn't all over billboards yourself, your music was always so beautiful, I thought you'd shine your light all over the world."

"I'm a junior reporter for the New York Times. No glamorous life for me I'm afraid." He chuckled darkly. "I get to sift through mountains of press releases trying to find a story, then have the tedious job of creating it and finding links and quotes and it's all just wonderful."

"Do you not play or sing at all anymore?" Kurt asked shocked.

Blaine looked at him, a battle raging between his eyes. Why couldn't he admit it? Why couldn't he piece together the puzzle that had been shattered all those years ago? He had half explained it to David yesterday, but that was only part of it, why couldn't he work out the rest? Sound it out loud?

"I can't." Blaine drained his orange juice in one, his throat feeling very dry all of a sudden. Speaking to David about these things was fine, he wasn't scared of him.

But of Kurt? He was terrified.

He couldn't explain why he was so scared of talking to Kurt, it had never been like that with them, even at the very beginning of their friendship they had always been one hundred percent honest with each other.

So why was it so difficult now? Was it because even after everything, Kurt was the one person he didn't want to let down, he had of course let him down a long time ago. But here he was now, his old friend, his one true love and soul mate, why was it so difficult for him to be honest?

"You can't what Blaine?" Kurt said, pushing gently. "You can't play anymore, or you can't talk about it?"

"Both." Kurt nodded.

"I know, and I respect how difficult this is for you, I always did."

"But I hurt you so much. And I'm still hurting you now; I can see it in your eyes."

"Blaine." Kurt whispered taking his hand. He rubbed the pad of his thumb along the join between Blaine's thumb and first finger. "The only reason I was hurting was because you wouldn't let me in, we were always so open and honest with each other and then literally over night that changed, and I couldn't understand it. I lost him too you know." Blaine grabbed the hand holding his with his other hand and gripped it tears stung his eyes as he clung to the tall man in front of him for dear life.

"I'm so sorry Kurt!" He gasped, sobbing now, thick tears running down his cheeks.

"Shh shh." Kurt said soothingly. He stood up not letting go of Blaine's hands, not that he could if he'd wanted to, the grip the smaller man had on him was too strong. Both literally and physically. He pulled Blaine up with him and walked around the breakfast bar until he was stood in front of the broken man. He pulled Blaine towards him using his free arm to wrap around him. At the closeness Blaine let go of Kurt's other hand and grabbed hold of Kurt's borrowed shirt burying his face in his chest as he sobbed harder, finally releasing the pain that he had bottled up for five long years.

Kurt wrapped his arms firmly around Blaine's shoulders and rubbed soothing circles on his back, head resting on the side of his head. He continued the comforting circles on Blaine's back and felt him start to relax after a while.

Once the sobbing had stopped Kurt walked them over to the sofa and sat down pulling Blaine gently down with him. He kept his arms firmly around Blaine's shoulders and Blaine in turn nuzzled into Kurt's chest.

"Sorry..." Blaine mumbled sitting up slightly after.

"It's ok; you've obviously been bottling this up for a long time."

"It's just...I have been such a mess, and I had no idea why. And then, seeing you again after all this time..."

"I know, shh shh." Kurt said pulling Blaine into him again as he heard his voice crack. "You lost your best friend Blaine. I can understand that, if I lost Mercedes or Rachel...Well I can't fathom it."

"There's more to it than that." Kurt nodded.

"You blamed yourself, Sean was looking for you that day, and Wes did what any other friend would have done, and that's the key point Blaine!" Kurt said. "If that gun had been pointing to David or Wes that day, you would have done the same thing! You didn't drag Wes in front of you to stop that bullet, you didn't dive behind him. He grabbed you and pulled you out of harms' way and got hit instead. It was not your fault."

"It was..."

"No it wasn't it was Sean's fault, he was sick, and is now isolated in his own private ward with padded walls because of it, but once again that is not your fault either!"

"I hurt you though." Blaine mumbled even quieter.

"Not intentionally!"

"Stop it Kurt! Stop making excuses for me!" Blaine said standing up and walking to the other side of the coffee table.

"You really want to know why I can't live with myself?" Blaine shouted. "It was my fault ok, it was my fault! Sean and Wes, and you, and everything was my fault!" He started pacing.

"If I hadn't been so frigging _charming_ Sean would never have fallen for me. I wouldn't have had to turn him down so he wouldn't have ever turned into psycho crazy stalker person. He never would have bought that gun to school; Wes wouldn't have thrown himself in front of it to protect me and he would still be here now. I wouldn't have tried to push you away and hurt you and we would probably still be together." Kurt winced slightly. "The reason I did it was because I loved you so much and thought it was a blessing that you hadn't been there that day! Because I am almost positive it would have been you who stepped in front of that bullet!"

_'He's right it would have'_ Kurt thought to himself.

"And if that happened I probably would have killed myself, seriously if I lost you that way...I never ever would have been able to even get up off the floor." Tears were rolling down his eyes. "I loved you so much, I couldn't stand to lose you."

"But you did!" Kurt said standing up now. "You pushed me away and you lost me, all I wanted to do was comfort you and make everything ok, and you pushed me away."

"Because I was so scared of you dying, I was so sure that something like that would happen again, I had nightmares about it every night, that it _had_ been you who stepped in the way and been killed that day. And the same dream would play on a loop quite often more than once in the same night, and every time I closed my eyes it was all I saw! And then to have to look you in the eyes and see you alive and well and laughing whilst expecting Sean to turn up with another gun. It near enough drove me mad Kurt. And I knew if you were with me, it would be putting you at risk, I couldn't stand the thought of losing you completely and indefinitely through death, and even though I lost you, you were still alive and breathing. You were safe. I never stopped loving you; it was because I loved you so much, I didn't want to put you at risk!"

"That's the stupidest thing I have ever heard!" Kurt said incredulously.

"Without you Kurt I was shell of my old self. I should never have pushed you away. You complete me, without you I am nothing, and I should have known that pushing you away was ridiculous because you were the only one who ever made me feel good about myself, you were the only person who could make me laugh when all I wanted to do was cry." He was almost sobbing now.

"Blaine..." Kurt whispered and looked at the man in front of him with sad eyes.

"And I know I've blown it, I know you moved on and I lost the right to you years ago, but I should never have pushed you away! I wouldn't be the mess I am today if I hadn't and I hate myself for it, I hate myself for not seeing how much I needed you. And knowing that I hurt you through my own stupidity." He looked at Kurt for a moment staring at him as though he was the only glass of water in the desert. Desperation and sadness in his eyes, he walked purposely towards him, and without thinking; as though it was the most natural thing in the world placed his hands on either side of Kurt's face and pulled him down into a needy and passionate kiss. Shocked Kurt found himself responding to the kiss, his hands came up to Blaine's face, cupping it as he moved closer deepening the kiss, Blaine opened his mouth and let his tongue tease Kurt's upper lip. This however jolted Kurt's mind, he suddenly realised what he was doing and gently moved his hands to Blaine's pulling them from where they toying with his morning hair.

"No Blaine!" Kurt said gently. He pulled away from Blaine, letting go of his hands and letting them fall to his sides. Blaine looked confused and apologetic.

"I-I'm sorry Kurt...I just. I still love you, and seeing you again, I don't know maybe it's the universe saying to us that it's meant to be." Kurt shook his head and placed his hands on Blaine's shoulders.

"No Blaine." He repeated. "You're a mess, if this happens now, it would fall apart again. And I'm sorry but my heart cannot handle that, not again." Kurt said his pain creeping through his whole body at his words, his heart was screaming for him to stop talking, to grab the beautiful man in front of him and never let him go. But his head was saying it was the right thing. And for the first time in his life, he was listening to his head.


	9. Chapter 9

**So sorry this took so long to post! i have been trying for weeks to work out how to write the ending and wanted to finish it in word before I posted again. Which i have now done. so here is the next chapter, may be the penultimate one, don't know yet, depends if I decided to break up the last one into two or not. Hope you enjoy it!**

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><p>Kurt removed his hands from Blaine's shoulders and made his way back into Blaine's bed room; he'd seen something earlier when he was looking for a t-shirt. He opened Blaine's closet doors and rummaged through the things on the floor he found the sleek leather case and picked it up, it was terribly dusty from not being used in so long. He thought for a moment before half smirking and dragged his finger through the dust writing a single word. He quickly changed back into his clothes from last night before exiting the room.<p>

He carried the case back into the lounge and saw Blaine stood with his back to him, the same spot he'd left him in.

"Blaine. Turn around." He said in a strong but kind voice. Blaine bowed his head and turned slowly, he looked up at Kurt and upon seeing what was in his hands he leapt back.

"What the hell are you doing with that? Get it away from me!" He said half shouting.

"You need the music Blaine; this is what is going to save you!"

"It won't, I can't play anymore."

"Yes you can, you just won't because of the memory of your friend. But what do you think Wes would say now if he saw you refusing to play? He'd be furious! And you know it." Kurt said stepping towards him. "You owe it to him Blaine, you owe it to your best friend and you owe it to yourself!" Kurt placed the guitar case on the coffee table.

"I am going to go home now. You need time and space on your own. I will call David when I leave here and tell him to tell your boss you will be off work for the next couple of weeks."

"I can't just take time off Kurt. And you can't come back in here and tell me what to do."

"Oh yes I frigging well can, and I am. I'm the only one who can tell you what to do! And I know what is going to help you. I love you Blaine, I always have and I always will. But we're not seventeen anymore and you need to sort your fucking life out!"

With that Kurt turned around and left shutting the door behind him. Once in the lift he fell against the mirrored wall and closed his eyes, hoping that he hadn't just made the biggest mistake of his life.

Back in the apartment Blaine stood staring at the leather case in front of him, he hadn't seen it since the day he moved in two years ago. He thought back over the many years that had passed since he last played, he thought about Wes and what he would do if he could see him now, in the back of his head he heard the faint memory of a gavel being slammed against a desk and chuckled to himself, he knew exactly what his old friend would have said and knew he'd be right, and Kurt was right.

He was a mess and needed to sort himself out, before anything else could happen, he needed to fix himself. As he walked towards the leather case on the table he gasped in shock. There on the lid of the case was a single word that hit him harder than anything else.

_COURAGE!_

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><p><strong>Sorry its so short, but I will post the next bitfinal bit in the morning if I have time before work, if not will be tomorrow afternoon! :) thanks guys! please R&R**


	10. Chapter 10

**Alas final chapter time has arrived, thank you to those of you who have favourited or alerted this story, and also to the few who have reviewed. I am working on another Klaine project and will let you know when I'm done, am going to take the time to make it good and ensure it flows better than this one, this one has kind of been my 'get back in to writing fic' and the next one should hopefully be longer!**

**Hope you enjoy it! please review!**

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><p>~Six months later~<p>

Blaine walked into the stuffy club his guitar case sung over his shoulder as he stood by the door he surveyed the room. It was a busy night, but then again Friday night usually were at the back of the room was a small stage where there was a piano, a stool and microphone set up.

Feeling the nerves rise up in his stomach he made his was forward, waving to the head waiter. It was his first performance in nearly six years and he was bricking it. He owed it to Wes to give it a try tonight. He had been practising for months having finally quit his job at the newspaper and it had all been leading to this moment. There were agency scouts here tonight ready to listen to him sing. It was now or never.

As he set himself up on stage he felt the crowd's eyes on him, wondering who this stranger was. He adjusted his microphone and looked out into the crowd David was sat at the bar looking at him, he waved and nodded smiling softly. Blaine returned the smile before continuing his scan of the room.

There was a faint tingling sound as the door opened and shut and he glanced up to see who it was. A familiar head of brown hair was walking towards David at the bar and Blaine smiled. The blue/green/grey eyes of the man whom he had left behind all those years ago was now sat at the bar looking at him expectantly.

After the disastrous reunion six months ago they had wiped the slate clean. Kurt had been such a rock for Blaine in the last few months and he was now surer than ever of his feelings for the man. However Kurt was still hesitant, Blaine had after all shattered his heart into oblivion. Blaine had grown a lot in the last few months and tonight he was going to them all just how much.

"Um, hey guys!" Blaine said speaking into the microphone. "My name is Blaine Anderson, tonight I will be singing a variety of songs both by well known artists, not so known artists and a few of my own creations." There was a soft clap "Before I begin I would just like to say that tonight is dedicated to an old friend of mine, he lost his life protecting mine a few years ago. I think about him every day and there have been days when I didn't think I could go on. Tonight is for you Wes, rest in peace."

As he started his skit Kurt watched from the bar, he felt pride wash over him. Blaine had done it, finally after five and a half years he was back where he belonged, and blatantly loved every minute of it. He was in his element as he moved from song to song and the crowd loved him.

As he finished his penultimate song 'Teenage Dream' with a wink at Kurt, who chuckled; he had to throw that in there didn't he? He finished playing and addressed the crowd.

"Ok so you guys have been great tonight, feels good to be back up on a stage playing and singing again. I know now that it is ok to still love the things I used to, and a big part of that goes to a very special person.

Shortly after Wes died I made a terrible mistake. I took my grief and guilt out on a very special person. I broke this man's heart and it is my biggest regret. A big part of why I've been a mess for five years was because I hurt the only person I've ever truly loved." Blaine looked into the crowd and locked his eyes onto Kurt's.

"Recently, by a pure miracle this man has come back into my life and has once again helped piece me back together again. But he is still hurting because of the way I acted and tonight I'm going to make one final attempt to put it right. If he loves me enough to give me another chance I promise to everything that is pure in this world that I will spend the rest of my life trying to make him happy, and trying to make up for hurting him so much. My final song is dedicated to Kurt Hummel, I love you so much Kurt and I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me. If not then I will leave here tonight and let you get on with your life. I hope his song is enough to express my feelings for you. I mean every single word." He moved over the piano and got himself comfortable before starting to play

_Every time our eyes meet,  
>This feeling inside me<em>

_Is almost more than I can take_

_Baby, when you touch me  
>I can feel how much you love me<br>And it just blows me away_

_I've never been this close to anyone or anything  
>I can hear your thoughts, I can see your dreams<em>

_I don't know how you do what you do  
>I'm so in love with you<br>It just keeps getting better_

_I wanna spend the rest of my life  
>With you by my side<br>Forever and ever_

_Every little thing that you do  
>Baby, I'm amazed by you<em>

As his fingers moved over the keys effortlessly he looked to Kurt in the audience, he was staring straight back at him tears in his eyes. Blaine could feel his emotions flailing as he started the next chorus.

_The smell of your skin  
>The taste of your kiss<br>The way you whisper in the dark_

_Your hair all around me  
>Baby, you surround me<br>You touch every place in my heart_

_Oh, it feels like the first time every time  
>I wanna spend the whole night in your eyes<em>

_I don't know how you do what you do  
>I'm so in love with you<br>It just keeps getting better_

_I wanna spend the rest of my life  
>With you by my side<br>Forever and ever_

_Every little thing that you do  
>Baby, I'm amazed by you<em>

_Every little thing that you do  
>I'm so in love with you<br>It just keeps getting better_

_I wanna spend the rest of my life  
>With you by my side<br>Forever and ever_

_Every little thing that you do  
>Oh, every little thing that you do<br>Baby, I'm amazed by you_

He finished playing and the crowd erupted into applause Blaine stood and bowed smiling at them briefly before moving his eyes to the bar, David was there smiling at him and next to him...was an empty bar stool. He looked at David and frowned, his friend glanced at the door and back again, the smile fading from his face. He stood up off the stool and bowed to his audience before dashing off stage, trying to make his way hastily through the crowd, which had doubled in size since he walked through it earlier. Finally he made it into the cool street outside. He looked around frantically for Kurt and finally found him sitting on a bench in Central Park across the street. He was staring at the Bay Bridge and didn't seem to notice Blaine approaching him. Blaine sat down.

"That was a beautiful song." Kurt said after a moment.

"Thank you, why'd you run out?"

"I'm not sure...I'm scared I guess."

"Of what?"

"Of you, of loving you again, opening myself up."

"I'm so sorry for the way I treated you Kurt. Like I said, it's my one biggest regret. I don't know what else I can do or say. The last few months you have helped me so much and being around you and spending time with you has just made me fall in love with you all over again. I cannot imagine my life without you."

Kurt closed his eyes and thought back to the first day he met Blaine, watching him sing the infernal Katy Perry song. He had been swept up off his feet and fell head over heels for the curly haired boy. The boy who had helped him truly accept who he was and had given him the courage to stand up to those that oppressed him.

He thought back to those stolen days at Dalton, where he had met so many people who had accepted him straight off and where he and Blaine had finally started a relationship.

The first kiss, the first time they'd said I love you, all the duets, and the night they had had sex for the first time. Kurt had never felt safer than he did that night, it had been the first time for both of them and it had been awkward, sensual and sweet and filled with so much love Kurt thought his heart would burst.

And then it did, he had loved Blaine so much and in a swift devastating second his heart had shattered in to a gazillion pieces with no one to save him. He had never been able to put the puzzle of his heart back together because there was a vital part of it missing, the part that had and would always belong to the man sat next to him.

Kurt needed him, and Blaine needed Kurt they were but two sides of the same coin and it was high time they were both hole again wasn't it?

"And I can't imagine my life without you Blaine." He said looking into his deep green eyes, which were leaking water. Wetness on his cheek told Kurt that he must be crying too.

"Oh Kurt I love you so much! I'm so sorry!" Blaine whispered as he placed his hand on Kurt's cheek and wiped away the tears he closed the distance between them and pressed their lips together. Kurt gasped and brought one of his hands up to Blaine's neck the other finding his waist and pulling him closer deepening the kiss. Blaine moved his other hand to Kurt's face and ran his fingers through his hair knotting them into the perfectly styled locks. Kurt's hands wrapped around Blaine's torso and he tentatively poked his tongue out, licking Blaine's top lip. Blaine opened his mouth and bade him entry, meeting Kurt's tongue with his own. He moaned deeply into Kurt's mouth and in response Kurt's grip on his tightened. After a few minutes Kurt pulled away gently and kissed him softly once before resting their foreheads together.

"Oh, there you are." Blaine said grinning.

"I've been looking for you forever." Kurt replied.

Fin

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><p><strong>Thank you so much to all my readers! <strong>

**Song is 'Amazed' by Lonestar**

**I do not own Glee, any of the characters or songs used in this fic, apart from my own OC's I make no profit from the works i publish I am just an avid fan who loves writing!**


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